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last night

  • Jun. 29th, 2007 at 9:16 PM
wedding
Last night was one of the hardest nights of my life. I have never had to literally hold myself from getting out of bed. Ethan cried from 12:10 to like 12:40 and then finally went to sleep. At 12:20 I started crying to and when he finally settled down and jumped right out bed to go check on him and he was fast asleep, sniffling a little but pretty much all asleep. So I thought that would be the end of the cry it out episode but I was sadly mistaken. Around 1:45 he started to cry again and by 2:00 I couldn't take it anymore and looked over at Doug and said, "how do we know if something isn't really wrong?" and he said, "WELL JUST GO CHECK ON HIM" Yes, he yelled at me, but I understood because the crying was just too much but I went to go check on him and as soon as I picked him up he stopped crying, laid his head on my shoulder, and promptly fell back asleep. As a family, we had a rough night but I hope that he can learn to self soothe. I really honestly tried to be the mom who never let her kids cry it out but after 4 nights of barely any sleep I had to do something. I kind of feel like a bad mom for letting him cry it out but on the other hand I know to be a good mom I have to have rest too and he really needs to be able to self soothe. If he would I would co-sleep with him but he is really hot natured and when he sleeps with us he gets really hot and wakes himself up. I really hope last night worked and he'll be able to sleep through the night tonight. I also think I really need a break and I feel bad for that too. Well, Ethan is in bed now and I really think I should be too. I have had a headache since about 2pm and I finally took something and it's starting to kick in so I think I shall retire.
  • Mood: drained

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